Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Zach...

The day our son Zach was born was...well a huge celebration.

Obviously.  Sure, parents celebrate the birth of their children but for us, it was extra special.

Before Zach was born, we had a daughter, Miranda Grace, who died in my arms 15 hours after she was born due to underdeveloped lungs after a complicated pregnancy and bed rest for 2.5 months.

We tried again to have a child and had a miscarriage.

So we picked ourselves up and tried another time. On April 3, 2004, Zachary Dean Hofen entered the world...began crying...

and he hasn't stopped making noise since. :)

We were so very happy. Life was good.


Like most parents, we wondered what Zach would become...

achieve...

and dream of.

What would his dreams lead him to become...


Would he be ornery....


And if so, would we be able to catch him at it....


 

Maybe he would be a water boy....


Or a pilot....


Or perhaps he would be a famous jet ski dude...


Professional fall leaf taster?...


Santa's co-pilot?...


We had no idea but the one thing we knew was whatever Zach chose to be, we would always be there, holding his hands, and encouraging him every step.


But the one role he never saw coming, was the role of big brother.


This new little guy certainly rocked his world...what was with this new "sharing my parents" thing? 

What happened to "all eyes on me because I'm so cute" way of life?

And what was with all the crying, stinky diapers, and noise at all hours of the day?

This brother thing seemed a little "sketchy" but Zach earned the title of "Best Big Brother" quickly.

And then his baby brother, Braden, got cancer. 

And Zach became a very grown up 4 year old overnight. His family was split into two locations, mom and Braden lived at the hospital and dad and Zach lived at home....

for over a year. 

Zach visited the hospital and we played. But it wasn't the same as living together.


Everyone's world changed overnight with that diagnosis. And Braden has been fighting cancer continuously for 6.5 years

And mom got cancer too so both his mom and brother fought cancer together.



Zach's live changed once again...and he became more and more aware that life isn't a guarantee.

He had to learn lessons of life and death, fear and uncertainty, and brutal realities no one should have to deal with before the age of 7.

He also learned how awesome people are and how kind they can be in your darkest hour.

He learned about God and His grace and mercy.

And he learned about courage, fight, and HOPE!

Zach continued to grow older while continuing to have a heart of kindness and love.

And he became a Chef...


A candle blower-outer...


A giver of smiles...


A patient brother...


An explorer...


A comedian...


Handsome....


Sweet....


An artist...

A friend...


A military hopeful...



A wrestler...


A drummer and trombone player...



A great snowball target...


And three months ago, at the age of 10, he became a bone marrow donor.    

                                                     
To try to save his little brother's life.

There was no other match in the entire world. Zach was the only one...and he was a perfect match.
Without Zach's bone marrow donation, Braden would have died in a very short time.

So Zach went through surgery to have his bone marrow extracted and then transfused into his brother.


Knowing full well that his cells could save Braden's life...

....or they might not.

That's a lot for a ten year old to carry on his shoulders.

After his cells were blessed by the Pastor in the room, Zach said, "Mom, this wasn't much fun but I would do it again."

And as the nurse transfused Zach's cells into Braden's body, the tubing miraculously formed the shape of a heart...



Zach didn't just donate his bone marrow.

He donated his love...

and brotherly HOPE.

Zach is a pretty amazing boy and I am blessed to be his mom.

I thank God for this little boy every single day.

And I learn from him....every single day.

I learn what LOVE really means.

I learn what HOPE really means.

And I learn that DREAMS take many different forms. 

It's not just about what title you will be called...what caption will be on your pictures.

It's about what caption your heart wields. 

What your heart shows the world about how to live life by putting other's before yourself....about taking risks to try to save others.

Zach is eleven now. 

I wonder how many more powerful lesson this young man has to teach me in the next 11.

I can't wait to find out.

We love you Zach!









Thursday, December 19, 2013

Kindness...

Each year since 2008, Santa Claus has appeared at our doorstep ringing our doorbell one night in December.

And there's a huge group of jolly friends with candles lit singing Christmas Carols with him.

6 years...

and counting. :)

And each year I get tears as they sing.

The feeling of being cared for

and hoped for is simply beyond description.

Our friends...

neighbors...

teachers...

....adults....

children...

even some babies...

all coming together to bring joy to our sons.

It's amazing and so heart warming and my favorite night in December...well other than Christmas Eve.

We have always contended that they are our good luck charm.

Last year after the group caroled at our house, we then walked to the homes of two other families in our neighborhood who had family members facing cancer and sang for them.

It was a very cold night and the family at the last house, invited us inside to sing to them.

When we had finished our carols, the lady who was fighting cancer said she had a request...

she asked us to sing "You Are My Sunshine".

There wasn't a dry eye in that house that night.

Both of the ladies we sang to last year earned their angel wings.

What a beautiful gift we were all able to give them last year...I'm sure it is something their families remember those smiles and the collective love and hope from each of us even today.

It truly is an enveloping comfort and warmth that is given by all of those beautiful faces and voices.

This year we continued down the block to the home of another neighbor who is fighting cancer..and whose birthday was yesterday.

We completely surprised her! :) It was PRICELESS!

And then we went to the home of some neighbors who just moved in...I think they liked it....

I don't see a "for sale" sign there today anyway. :)

Doing something kind for someone else doesn't have to cost anything...bringing holiday cheer is free.

And it makes a huge difference for the spirits of the people receiving the gift.


"Kindness in words created confidence. 

Kindness in thinking creates profoundness.

Kindness in giving creates love."
--Lao Tzu






'Tis The Season...

Do something kind for someone during this season of HOPE.

A kind word...a hug...a smile...

All are infectious and all are appreciated.

Kindness is contagious.

And to all of you who have joined us over the years, 

Thank you for six years of kindness to all of you...

and here's hoping for about 60 more years. TAKE THAT cANCER!

You are OUR heroes!

Merry Christmas Everyone!



Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Our Summer Vacation...

It is very difficult to choose the perfect vacation when you believe it is likely your last as a family of four.

We weren't planning on going on vacation this summer, it was just too expensive. We thought we might drive to the zoo in Omaha for a weekend.

Once Braden received the diagnosis of mds and the news that he had several weeks to a few months to live, a vacation to make memories seemed pressing.  And that is when people from all over the world jumped in to help.

Two friends of ours set up a fund online for our vacation. We had no idea they were doing this, and I think they may have been a little nervous about doing it...they were determined and we were very grateful.

That fund raised over $20,000 and we were able to go pretty much anywhere we wanted. We thought about things that Braden loves and that Zach would enjoy too...and we took climate and temperatures into consideration.

We arrived at a decision to go to LasVegas...no, not to gamble the fund double or nothing...for one reason only...to see the water fountain at the Bellagio. One of Braden's most favorite things in the world is fountains...he calls them "pretty water".  Then we would go to DisneyLand in Anaheim and see the World of Color water feature...lastly to San Diego to see Sea World and the ocean and take a boat ride on the water.

And that is just what we did. However, the story doesn't end there.

It's really just the beginning.

As if anything could really top hundreds of people giving up over $20,000 for a vacation and to pay medical bills which is EXTREMELY useful. It's amazing how those mount up even with great insurance.

That gift is beyond description...thank you to EVERYONE who helped!

As I said, the story only begins there....

Before we left, I had a lot of texts, emails, phone calls, and help from many people to make this as special as possible for Braden.

First, a very sweet friend helped set up a room at the Bellagio that had a fountain view. We could watch the fountains from our room and the first time he saw them, he flipped!! That was during daylight hours, and at night, he fought sleep so he could stay up to see it one more time.



The look on his face was the best.

And that evening, Las Vegas had a thunderstorm.

Seriously!!

Flooding, lightning, wind, the whole works. AND...a rainbow.

Thank you Miranda Grace.

We then picked up our rental car...it was supposed to be a Chevy...we freaked out when a brand new Mercedes Benz SUV was waiting in our spot!!  We double checked to be sure it was ours and then we made a break for it before they realized the mistake! :) LOL!!

UNREAL!!!!

We drove across the desert to Braden's delight..he loves cactus...and arrived in California to the Grand Californian Hotel...AWESOMENESS!!

We were once again showered with the VIP treatment thanks to a friend who helped us get that room with a view of California Adventure Park that was amazing. The roller coasters were right outside our room and we had a small view of the World of Color show from our balcony as well! :)



 Then we met this beautiful lady...the sister-in-law of Braden's preschool's teacher's friends.  Yes...follow that...point is that our new friend, Lisa, organized something we could never have dreamed of for Braden the next day.


Lisa is the Lead for the parade at DisneyLand and she got us a private meeting with Mickey Mouse!! UNREAL!!! THEN, she took us on a boat ride in DisneyLand on our own boat...very special. She left us and told us when to show up for the parade (and another show) where she had seats organized for us...

We showed up for the parade and Lisa was back...it was her day off!! Again, unreal!! She handed us this card that had the signatures of all of the characters in the parade!!


And as the parade proceeded, we got lots of waves and a few hugs from several of the characters!! Braden was full on freaking OUT during the parade. Screaming at the top of his lungs at each character, "IT'S ME...BRADEN!!  HI GOOFY, HI DONALD DUCK!!!!" and on and on and on.  He REALLY liked Donald Duck.

We left Lisa and rode a bunch of rides...the boys' favorites were the Buzz Lightyear Ride and the Star Wars Simulator (which we did SEVERAL times).

I got a text from Lisa telling me that something very special was being planned for Braden during the fireworks show that night...for which she had again organized VIP seating.

As we waited on the bench for the fireworks, a group approached up and told us that 12 special fireworks had been placed on the castle JUST for Braden. The actual fireworks had Braden's name written on them and they were not usually fired off...they were specially choreographed in just for him.

I cried.  And as we waited for them to start the show, they presented special "cast only" pins to the boys, balloons, and so many other special things!!

The fireworks were beautiful...my phone battery had died so I don't have pics but Brian does on his phone.  It was AMAZING!!!

But wait...there's more.

After the show, they swooped us off to a special room where we opened our eyes and right there, in front of us was...Donald Duck!!!

Not even kidding!!

And the room was FILLED with special mementoes from the gang at DisneyLand.  They had a photographer there and the next day we picked up a whole packet of photos they made for us!! It was UNBELIEVABLE!!!











We could honestly have never dreamed something this amazing.  Thank you Lisa!! It was a magical day!!

The next day we went to California Adventure Park and it was also wonderful...and the World of Color show is beyond explanation!! I felt that same way watching that as I did the first time I watched a Cirque show.  I highly recommend it!

Then off to San Diego where another friend got us a great deal on a room at Seaport Village with an amazing view!  We started at Sea World. More special surprises were waiting for us there as a friend has a friend who trains whales and dolphins there.  Pretty sure that is the coolest job EVER!!

Well...Wendy gave us a behind the scenes tour of the Dolphin Show and we got to meet them and touch them...and feed them!! SOO cool!! Wendy even organized it so that we got to go backstage at the Clyde and Seymore Show (sea lions and otters) to meet them as well! I really cannot tell you how amazing that was!! Touching and feeding dolphin, pilot whales, sea lions, and otters....WOW!!!! Everything I have of the boys touching and feeding them is video and that won't upload here.  Rats!








The next day we were off to LegoLand but FIRST, we got to meet up with some of our friends who moved out there (and who are now luckily moving back home!)  They gave us LegoLand tickets and lots of hugs!! SO much fun!! And we had a blast at LegoLand as well!!



Braden was getting a little worn out on crowds and no routine so we decided to do some things that had fewer crowds and required less "come on...we need to go now" stuff.  So we went to see the Midway ship which was right outside our hotel and went for a cruise on a boat...that was AWESOME!! He loved seeing the wake behind the boat!! And the Captain even let him drive!! 






The next day we did some small detours like Balboa park where we actually PLAYED at a park!! :)  And then we drove along the highway and found the beach. It was a real detour...we hadn't planned it but it was there so we stopped and did the Kansas Kids version of the beach without swim suits. :)

I took this picture of Braden and later saw that he has two shadows in it. For me, it was a sign. There is one shadow that is weak and wobbly and one that is strong and straight...I see it as the two sides of Braden...the one that is sick and the one that is strong...and the strong side wins.

I don't know if he wins on Earth or in Heaven but I know which way I'm voting!! :)



We flew to Phoenix from San Diego and on our two hour layover, we got to see Brian's parents...the boys were THRILLED to see Grandma and Poppy!! :)

And when we landed in KC from Phoenix, we had a very special surprise waiting for us.  KCI Airport, the City of Kansas City, Missouri, and SouthWest Airlines organized a very special treat for Braden because he likes water features so much.

They did a water salute to him...lined two airport firetrucks on the runway and sprayed the plane with a heart shaped arch of water. B was THRILLED!!!  This is a very rare thing...reserved only for retiring pilots, and war heroes...so meaningful and so beautiful.

I fought tears to tape it from inside the plane. I have attached a news story from KSHB 41 as well as video that KCI shot of the water salute. We simply cannot thank everyone who made this happen enough. Mark Williams, a parent of a BVSW softball player, is responsible for organizing this. We have never met him!! Simply remarkable!!

Here is the news story from JiaoJiao Shen who is a reporter who does so much for our children with cancer!! :) (and Braden LOVES her)

http://www.kshb.com/dpp/news/local_news/kansas-city-firefighters-offer-special-tribute-to-young-cancer-patient-at-kci


And here is the YouTube Video that KCI shot...it's amazing!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWfXJ17cU2w&feature=youtu.be


It was a vacation that was beyond our biggest dreams and we cannot ever thank everyone enough!!

TAKE THAT cANCER!!!


Tomorrow reality hits again...we go to clinic to have his bone marrow aspirates and biopsy as well as begin his shots that arrived the day after we did.

cAncer hasn't gone away...but we sure got a nice break from it before we start the real battle!!

HOPE!!!