3 Year "Breast-aversary"

Normally, cancer people use the term "cAncerversary" (remember I won't capitalize cancer because it's not important enough).

But...I like "breast-aversary" much better! :)

That way the "c" word doesn't even get mentioned!!

My breasts get the credit...

And I giggle. :)

TAKE THAT cANCER!

Three years ago on January 6, I found the lump in my right breast.

I have always done self exams and my yearly mammograms.

My mom died from brain cancer, my dad had prostate cancer, my mother-in-law had breast cancer, my father-in-law has fought kidney cancer, my brother in law died from bone cancer, and then there's my son.

He's been fighting Stage IV, High Risk Neuroblastoma since he was 3.

I had to leave my career because his treatments were 24/7/365 and we pretty much lived at the hospital.

He had a 30% chance for survival when he was diagnosed on December 28, 2007.

Then on August 11, 2009, his cancer relapsed and we were told there was no known cure.  Less than a 10% chance he would survive for 5 years.

Less then 10%...that's the same odds our daughter Miranda Grace had that she would survive when she was born on August 1, 2001.

She had hypoplastic lungs and she lived for 15 hours,

and then she died in my arms.

Unfortunately, we KNOW what less than 10% means.

We elected to try experimental treatments to try to prolong Braden's life...we began getting treatments at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia with Dr. Yael Mosse...

She's amazing...

And she gave us HOPE!

As of January, 2010, Braden had already undergone one MIBG therapy in October 2009 (liquid radiation that is injected into his body...he had to stay in a lead lined room, between lead shields, no one could touch him until his radiation level declined enough which took over a week...)

We could only have limited time in his room (with a dosimeter to measure our own radiation exposure)...

Yet...

It was injected INTO him....

Think about that for a minute.

The decisions we have faced for Braden's therapy have been and continue to be impossible.

He was one of only THREE children in the WORLD who would receive this particular type of experimental MIBG isotope in a Phase One Trial...

Phase One Trials are not conducted to see if the treatment works,

Just to see if it is "safe".

Not the type of trial you want to have to do...

But...

We had nothing else and because he was facing "no known cure"...

Doing something no one else had ever done, seemed fairly logical.

SCARY, but logical...

And just another in a long line of impossible decisions we have had to make.

As of  January 6, 2010, we were heading back to Philly in just FOUR days for a second therapy because the first one had knocked all of the disease out expect for the disease in his liver.

We hoped it would knock that out too.

So on January 6, 2010, we were playing together, wrestling on the bed, giggling, and having fun when...

Braden accidentally whacked me on the side of my right breast.

I rolled over and grabbed the side of my breast right under my armpit and felt a HUGE, hard lump.

I got up, went to the bathroom and did a self exam.

I knew.

I knew what it was right then.

My son was facing almost certain death and now I felt a lump.

DAMN IT!!

I didn't have time for this...

I need to be with my SON...to help him fight.

I didn't have time for surgeries and chemo and radiation and appointments and the yada yada yada yada...that I knew was coming.

I was not sad.

I was not scared.

Not even for one second.

I was PISSED!

I went to see my OBGYN the next afternoon and when she felt it she said, "it might not be...we don't know yet but I can get you in right now to have it imaged and we can find out before you leave."

I just laughed.

She laughed too...she had been with me through every step of the past 10 years of the crapfest called my life.

I told her that she had been through everything with us and she knew better... :)

She didn't bother to pretend...

It was cancer and we both knew it.

And it would WAIT until we got home from Philly and Braden's therapy.

We would deal with it then.

I knew that no matter WHAT...

I would take the most aggressive treatment path possible.

SO...

When my breast surgeon gave me my diagnosis (following weeks of imaging, biopsies, etc)

I asked her to not only take my right breast off, but to do a bilateral mastectomy.

Cut both girls off...

After all...

They were trying to kill me!!!!

The night before my surgery, I looked down at them and said,

"Okay girls...tomorrow is a BIG day for us...

I'm going to cut you off because you are trying to kill me"

And the girls said...

...nothing....

Boobs are stupid!

I honestly don't think that losing both of my breasts that drooped to my belt...

and replacing them with a glorious set of perfectly matched, perky boobies that don't require a bra...

was a a really horrible thing.

Sure...I can't feel anything on my chest

Or the back of my arms...

BUT...

I will be 90 years old...

Bent over my walker...

and the girls will be standing straight and tall

Saying, "Go ahead Deliece...

lay down and take a nap...

We'll stay RIGHT here....

Standing up straight and tall..

We will NEVER lay down!"....   :)

LOL!!

Three years later I am:

Feeling GREAT,

Have perky boobies,

LONG, THICK hair,

And I am happy!!

OVER THE MOON HAPPY...

Because against ALL odds,

 my son is here too!!

And THAT is ALL that matters!!!

TAKE THAT cANCER!!!